Addiction and mental health

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Like many people, after a long, hard day at work, you might find yourself relaxing with a couple of beers, or maybe it's a couple of glasses of wine to help you get off to sleep.

And whilst an occasional drink wouldn't usually cause any problems, if you find yourself drinking most nights of the week, even if that's not getting drunk, it could be a sign of problem drinking.

Alcohol dependency can affect just about anybody.

And because it's a condition that progresses gradually over time, it's really important to be aware of your drinking habits, because that means you might spot the warning signs and be able to make changes before it's too late.

Whilst wine or beer themselves are not addictive, the alcohol in there can be, and any form of excessive drinking could lead to problems further down the line.

Today, I'm joined by Siobhan from the charity With You, who specialise in a wide range of support and guidance to help recognise signs and patterns of addiction, as well as supporting those who are going through it.

So I have a list of questions for you, Siobhan, if that's all right?

Yeah.

Love to have a general chat and answer some of the questions.

So firstly, alcohol addiction can be really difficult to recognise.

It's widely available, alcohol, you can buy just about anywhere.

It's linked to social situations and also linked to celebrations and enjoyment.

So it's quite a tricky one.

It can be really hard to tell the difference between someone who just likes to have a few drinks and someone who is developing harmful drinking, or even worse, dependency.

So what are some of the signs and symptoms of alcohol dependency or harmful drinking?

Well, like you say, lots of us use alcohol in social situations, and for most people, it has no impact on their lives.

But there are things that you can look out for if things are becoming more difficult and it's starting to encroach on your daily life.

So some of those things will be are you regularly using alcohol to de-stress?

Are you drinking more nights than you are not drinking?

Can you routinely not remember things that have happened the night before?

And are you feeling more unwell on a more regular basis?

Also, things like you might start to have accidents, trips and falls.

And you might start to take risks that aren't usual for you to take.

If things are becoming more problematic, and therefore, we're looking at people who are potentially more drinking more dependently, then there are signs and symptoms to look out for like, for example, that you might need to drink earlier in the day to make yourself feel well.

That you start to have withdrawal symptoms.

So those would include feeling hot and sweaty and clammy, not being able to engage in things, not being able to remember things as well as you could do.

And it could start to have an impact on your general life.

So that's on your ability to work, on your finances, and more importantly, on the relationships with your family and friends, and your potential work colleagues.

Okay.

And it's tricky, isn't it?

Because a lot of people will drink regularly and it never become harmful, be able to stop if they want to.

And for some people, actually, they might drink less.

And I think we've kind of got this idea in our minds that alcohol dependency, we have an image in our minds, don't we, of somebody who wakes up first thing in the morning, drinks very strong alcohol, you know?

But actually, it can affect anyone, can't it?

And there are people living who have got good jobs, who are successful, you know, mums, and they're living with alcohol dependency and managing to keep going, but the issue is there.

Yes, absolutely.

So I think you're right.

We do have this image of what somebody looks like that's dependent on alcohol.

But for a lot of people, that isn't the case.

So people are actually able to function.

That they will be drinking, they will be drinking discreetly, and they'll be doing it more kind of secretly and hiding it from people where they can.

People become really skilled at that because we know that people will be concerned about us and we won't want people to see us drinking.

But it isn't always the case that you can't function.

A lot of people hold down perfectly good jobs, they go to work, they function with their family.

But over time, it will start to have an impact.

And it's a question of where is that line?

Because some of us, especially sort of busy working parents or people who have highly stressful jobs, might drink regularly to relax.

You know, come home, end of the day, draw a line under it, and have a couple of drinks.

And that's sort of your you time.

Is this okay?

And when does it become a problem?

I think a lot of people use alcohol as a coping mechanism.

And sometimes, if we're having a drink when we come home and it helps us de-stress, that's fine.

But it's when it starts to become more than that.

So it's about being consciously aware of what you're drinking.

So for example, over the space of a week, if you were to drink six glasses of wine or six pints of beer, that would be considered low risk.

But if you start to drink more than that and it starts to happen more nights and it's not happening, that's when you need to kind of be aware and be conscious.

If you are having say like half a bottle of wine every evening, then that starting to become more problematic.

There's something about it creeping up then, is it?

It was one glass and now it's one large glass.

Yeah.

And then it's half a bottle.

And before you know, it could be a bottle.

Yeah, most of the people that we work with, nobody started off thinking, "I'm going to drink a bottle of wine every evening.

" It's 'cause we do that and we come home, we'll have a glass of wine.

And then life becomes a little bit more stressful.

Sometimes things happen and we have issues and problems to deal with, and we remembered that that one glass of wine made us feel a little bit less stressed, so we'll have two glasses of wine.

And it's generally something that creeps up.

So it's being aware of what you are drinking on a daily and weekly basis.

Yeah, just sort of keeping tabs on it.

Yeah.

Okay.

I think lots of us tend to save up our drinking for the weekends.

What is the official definition of binge drinking?

And when does that really become a problem?

So we often don't want to drink during the week because we don't wanna go to work with a hangover.

We've got things that we need to be doing and we'll save our drinking up for the weekend like you say.

And for most of the people, that's absolutely fine.

But there are sort of like guidelines of what would go over normal drinking that would be class binge drinking.

So for women, that's more than six units.

So that would be like three medium glasses of wine or three pints of beer.

And for men, four units.

So that's four medium glasses of wine or four pints of beer.

So it's much lower than people expect it to be.

The other thing is as well, is that everyone's different and our tolerances are different.

And as we get older, our ability to process alcohol is diminished.

So that tolerance will get lower with age.

Okay.

I think lots of people watching this will think, "Okay, so binge drinking, those levels are quite low.

" And I think lots of people would think they are binge drinking.

If you do that every now and again, how much of an issue is that?

And if you're doing it every weekend, what's the dangers of it?

Well, if it's every now and again, you know, we go to parties, we go to social events, and people will have a drink more than they normally would, and that's gonna have no impact really on your everyday life or on your health.

But if you are starting to do that every weekend, then that's an accumulative effect and it'll start to build up.

And one of the things is that that's where that creep comes in.

So people will start to do that on the weekends, but then it'll be like, "Well, I was okay," so Monday evening.

'Cause Monday's that day at work, isn't it, where we have to go back to work, so it starts to creep in.

So it's not just the harmful effects on your body, it's the way that it sort of like makes that creep of alcohol quicker and more dangerous.

And I actually have a couple of friends who have stopped drinking altogether, joined AA.

Not because they were drinking lots through the week, but it was more about their behaviours when they drank.

When they started drinking at the weekend they find they couldn't stop.

That they'd end up not remembering what they'd done the night before and then finding out what they'd done.

You know, their behaviours weren't what they wanted them to be.

So they kind of felt that that was a kind of dependency on alcohol and that they needed to stop altogether.

And I think there's different sort of like levels for different people.

So if you feel like, "I'm gonna come home "just a couple of nights a week, "and have one glass of wine," or "I'm gonna save my drinking until the weekend, "and stick within those limits," and it's having no impact on your life, that's fine.

But other people, they will feel quite differently about it.

And I think for us as individuals to make that sort of like informed choice.

We know what the sort of like safer levels are, are we drinking within those levels?

Also, when we work with people that have got alcohol dependency or with alcohol issues, problematic or harmful drinking, it isn't always about abstinence, it's about getting to a level that's comfortable and healthy for you.

Mm-hmm.

That's really interesting.

We know much more now than ever before about the effects of drinking alcohol, yet there are loads of myths out there about drinking and drinking problems.

Can you talk us through some of these myths?

So one of the biggest myths out there is it's young people who are drinking, who are drinking more than anything else.

But all the evidence tells us that younger people are drinking less now than they've ever drunk, and it's older people who are drinking more.

And we've done quite a bit of research about this and looked at the reasons why that would be.

So where, as we get older, we've got more time on our hands.

We've got empty nest.

You know, we've not got children at home and we've not got those same responsibilities.

And also, while that's a good thing, it kind of like isolates people a little bit.

People feel a little bit lonely and therefore, people will remember that, "Oh!

"That one glass of wine felt quite nice.

" And then it's like two glasses of wine.

So one of the myths is that it's young people that are drinking more, but it actually isn't, it's older people that are drinking more.

I guess we kind of all experienced a bit of that in the pandemic, didn't we?

We were a bit more lonely.

We weren't able to do the things we used to do.

Our lives were smaller and quieter and a lot of people drank more.

Yeah, and one of the things that we noticed was that people were drinking more during the pandemic.

We noticed that sort of like one in four people were concerned about their own drinking towards the end of the pandemic, and a number of family members had raised concerns.

When we came out of COVID, we started to see people, and we started to see, "Oh, you know, "that person's drinking more "than they would've done beforehand.

" So it was a little bit hidden during sort of like COVID.

And on that then, Siobhan, we've kind of covered why it's so important that we pay attention to our own drinking habits.

But what if you notice that a family member, friend, a work colleague, is drinking harmfully and you're concerned about them, what's the best way to bring it up?

Well, we did quite a bit of work on this and we launched a find the right moment campaign.

And it was about you've noticed how someone's drinking is affecting them and you're a little bit concerned, but we all feel a little bit wary about raising that conversation with someone as well.

So there are things that you can do.

Is like one is don't raise the issue when someone's intoxicated.

That's probably the worst time.

So if you're out at the pub and you're all drinking socially, that's not the time to raise it.

Even though that might be when you've noticed someone drinking more.

Especially if their behaviour is not great, it might be when you feel that you might feel a bit annoyed or angry and it might come out.

Yeah, and they might be a little bit more stressed, or a little bit more to like different in their character.

But that's really not the best time to raise it.

So look for those green light moments.

Look for a time when the person's not drinking, when you're both sort of like in a different situation.

Maybe you're having coffee, so that it's a different sort of like atmosphere.

Think about what you're gonna say.

Think about being calm, think about not looking for the negativity in it.

And even if someone stops you, to keep those communication channels open.

Also, one of the things is be aware for some sort of negative feedback.

When you've raised with someone that you've got a real concern for them, people need a little bit of time to process that and to reflect on that and to think about that.

So it might be that they're quite negative and you get a bit of negative feedback.

Be prepared for that, keep those channels of communication open, and raise it again.

Sometimes, and a lot of the time, people will raise it with you when they've had time to reflect.

So it's just giving people that time to have that little bit of time to think about their own behaviours.

When I've been asked that question, I sometimes say, whether it's about alcohol or even about mental health, it's always best to say to the person, "I have noticed," or "I am feeling worried about you" or "I've been thinking that," rather than saying, "You are.

" You know, "You are drinking too much," or "You are.

.

.

" Because that can really get somebody's back up, can't it?

Somebody can't really argue with your own feelings and your own perceptions.

So that can be quite helpful as well.

Yeah, absolutely.

And I think it often comes across as quite judgemental when you're saying to someone, "You're doing this, you're doing that.

" Whereas if it's about you, it's less judgemental and people are more able to take that on board.

And the other thing that what I'd advise is that you have some sort of like strategy ready to help somebody.

Because if someone does say then, "Okay.

"I hear what you're saying.

"I've had those concerns myself," it's good to have had a little bit of information about where people can go for help, what they can do next.

So that also supports that you're not being judgemental, you're just there to help someone.

I think and don't underestimate the power of just raising it, because sometimes, that is what that person needs to hear just to bring it home to them and get them thinking, and maybe accepting that there is a problem.

Yeah, oftentimes, people that are having problems with alcohol have thought it about themselves for some time.

And they've thought, "Do I have a problem?

"Do I not have a problem?

" But then, what we do is we sort of like say, "Oh, no, I don't.

It's fine.

"No one else has noticed, so it must be okay.

" So the actual thing of someone raising it with you and noticing it, kind of sets that little light bulb off for a lot of people as well.

So not an easy thing to do, but a really important thing to do.

And finally, if somebody does need help with this, what treatments and support is available?

There's lots of treatment available, support for people with alcohol issues.

So it might be that you're not alcohol dependent but you've got harmful drinking or problematic drinking.

And it might be that what you wanna do is cut down on your drinking or drink less days a week.

Oh, so it's not always about an all-or-nothing, teetotal?

No.

And I think- Not for everybody.

That's kind of one of the things that people think about sort of like drinking, is that you have to be completely abstinent.

Yeah.

For people who are alcohol dependent, that probably is the course of action.

But for most of us, if we're just a little bit concerned and we want to reduce our drinking, services can help you to do that as well.

Okay.

So there's lots of support that would happen.

You might need to have something like an alcohol detox, but the majority of support's around sort of like supporting you with talking therapies, group work, groups like AA.

But there's lots of other different types of group out there.

And also, support for your loved ones.

So any of them, it's a concerned other, potentially the person that raised it with you.

If they're feeling concerned for you, it's good for them to get support.

And we know statistics show that if you get support and your loved one gets support, you are much more likely to be successful.

Okay, great.

Well, I think that really gives some hope to people, hopefully, if they're struggling, and they've been listening to this and think that they do have a problem.

What would be the next step for them?

If somebody's listening to this thinking, "This is me.

"I have a problem.

I need to do something about this.

" Where can they go?

Well, they can contact their Bupa team or they can go online and they can look for their local alcohol service.

Every borough and area in the country has a local alcohol service.

So they can go in, they can be assessed by nurses.

They'll be able to determine the level of drinking that they're at and the treatment that they need.

Or they can come and see their GP.

Or they can come and see their GP.

A lot of our referrals into services come from GPs because people will raise that as their first point of call.

Because often they've got a good relationship and a good rapport with their GP.

Okay.

Great.

Well, thank you so much.

That's been so informative.

Really helpful.

And thanks for giving us your time.

You're welcome.

And don't forget, if you're Bupa health insurance customer then alcohol addiction is covered as part of your mental health cover.

So pick up the phone and speak to a member of the mental health team, and they'll listen to your concerns, and if necessary, advise you on the correct treatments.

Thank you.

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